Monday, June 30, 2008

Grit and Grime

In an effort of grand exploration I went for a float down yonder river. It was grand. It was exploratory. It was hot. It was muddy. I was barefoot. I made it home and tried to convince my roommates that the most Christlike response would be to wash my feet.
"What Would Jesus do?" I asked.
"Jesus would wash your feet. But society would deem that....weird," Dale responded, "I'll pass."
John was my only remaining hope and I continued to press the argument. John, get in here and wash my feet!" I yelled this time hoping my pastor like enthusiasm would elicit a response.
"What Would Jesus Do?"
"Jesus is in here sitting on the couch watching TV."
You just can't beat that argument. These days even Jesus can't resist the Simpsons.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

On Summer and Roosters

  1. I read much faster when it isn't for class.
  2. I've underestimated mustard for quite some time now. We have some catching up to do.
  3. Contrary to popular belief Christian Slater isn't a smuck.
  4. Tillamook Ice Cream is really really good.
  5. Doctors should recommend ten hours of sleep. Society would benefit.
  6. The Corn Flakes commercial is deceiving, Roosters don't crow once, they crow until the sun has reached the highest point in the sky.
  7. My neighbor has a Rooster.
  8. The city doesn't discourage Rooster enthusiasts.
  9. The city probably should.
  10. Rooster enthusiasm is rather selfish.
  11. The alarm clock has rendered city Roosters obsolete for some time now.
  12. Roosters should probably go back to their roots: egg making.
  13. If doctors recommended ten hours of sleep Rooster enthusiasm would decline.
  14. Society would benefit and I wouldn't hate my neighbors.